I am the young wife of a man recovering from a pornography addiction. We have been married
for 3 years, have had two children, and most of our relationship has been battling a war on
My husband's sexual brokenness has put a huge burden on our family. The issue has marinated
our home in anger, bitterness, jealously, depression, and fear. I have struggled with PTSD, Post-
postpartum Depression and Anxiety, suicidal thoughts, despair, and despondency. He attempts
over and over to stay sober- to not look at those images that shape his mind and hinder his
physical sexual stamina. His moments of weakness stem from past family issues and childhood
sexual abuse. He used pornography as an outlet, sometimes 12 times a day as a young teen. Since
his late teens, my husband has desperately tried to kick the habit multiple times with a hopeless
frustration. He tells me that pornography is poison to his mind. After he has stumbled, he sinks
into a deep despair and depression. He feels powerless, oppressed, and hates himself... isolating
himself from everyone and everything.
I appreciate that he is trying to recover and has attended support groups, limited his exposure,
and sought accountability. We both depend on the Lord ultimately and have found peace only in
His sacrifice and glory. There is no peace in Texas's saturated sexual culture and influence.
Our children have seen our anger and have suffered from the effects of my husband's addiction
as well. The quality of parenting is lacking when both parents are hurting and depressed.
Growing up in Upstate New York, I rarely saw a sex shop, and I did not see nearly as much
softcore porn magazines displayed in grocery stores. I enjoyed my Yankee state freedom of
being a child curious about sex. Today, I raise my children in the great state of Texas. Today, my
children are not free to be curious because they are overexposed. Today, I fear taking my
children on an outing because they are targets of human sex trafficking.
I am appalled that the state with the most human sex trafficking is also a state littered with sex
shops, pornography, divorces galore due to adultery and pornography addictions, and over-
I would hope that Texas move forward with dignity in recognizing that the amount of
pornography consummation and addictions in today's society is a real problem. It is a drug, and I
believe that everybody needs to be aware of the mental, relational, and physical risks. I would
hope that we care enough about our children to not let them fall to addiction without knowing
that a life with pornography will also likely be a life of intense pain. I would hope that men and
women recognize that pornography does not empower women, but rather shackles performers in
drugs, suicide, and abuse. I would hope that the theoretical war on women would not end with
careers and voting and judgement, but that we would free women from their bonds of addiction
and sexual expectations. I would hope that we care enough for our men who are addicted and
need help and love in a time when they are targeted and taken advantage of- sucked from our marriages, families, and even their lives as they are chained to the constant need of the high from
seeing photo-shopped bodies of naked human beings.
I would hope that wives and mothers like me wouldn't feel helpless, useless, depressed, burdened, frustrated, and alone.
If there is hope for Texas, will you move forward to protect her people?